Collapse (The Stress Poem)

You know those medical dramas on TV
When they cut to those scenes in the ER
And the patient is lying there trying
Tryingsohardtobreathebutshecan’tbecauseherlunghascollapsedontoitself
And the doctor needs to pull herself together
Because in a second she has to
STAB
A syringe into the patient’s chest to inflate her lung

Well I feel like I’m caught in that scene now
The hectic frantic panic of the ER
The blood on my hands and the screaming in my ears
And the pain that I imagine in my intestines
(It’s somehow there)
I am at once
The hesitant doctor and
The suffocating patient and
The collapsed lung and
Every single tensed-up muscle in the room forced into immobility

I am all those and nothing at all.

I’m just sitting here,
Writing about a stab that will never come to save me.

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